Harvard Psychiatrist Dr Steven Miller is passionate that many child custody evaluators are not properly qualified for the job.
OUR CASE IS CLEAR CUT SO I AM SURE I WILL WIN CUSTODY !
You might be convinced that you will win custody for any number of reasons which could include:
-you know the other parent is neglectful of your children;
-the other parent physically disciplines the children;
-the Court understands women are the best parents;
-the other parent is a liar;
-the other parent is too lax on discipline;
-I have the best lawyer;
-I have many university degrees and the judge will realise that I am the best placed to educate our kids;
-I like sport and are good at sport and the judge will realise that I am best to foster our children's sporting needs;
-I am religious so the judge will realise I am the best person and therefore the best parent;
-the Court won't change the status quo;
-the child always tells everyone they want to live with me;
-I have evidence the other parent is poisoning the mind of the child against me and the Court will want to remove the child from the custody of a psychological abuser;
-Judge X likes joint custody;
-Judge Y likes sole custody;
-the other parent had an affair.
The simple reality is almost no-one can predict the outcome of child custody cases as the Judge who makes the decision has no training on what is in the child's best interests or any protocol to assist them. They make their decision entirely on their whim and selectively pick bits of information out of each parent's case to support their decision if they publish their decision in writing. No-one can ever see into their mind to see why they really made their decision. Most Judges leave an invitation for further litigation and some don't. Many judgements never get published and of those that do they only write up a small portion of the information about the case in the judgement. Many cases never make it to a final trial. Unlike other people Judges have no accountability for their actions.
Despite writings in many books on family law about the revulsion of a parent who would destroy the contact and relationship of a child with the other parent the Australian Family Court's long standing practice was to award sole custody to such a parent in cases where litigation dragged on for a long time. The Court has been loathe to publish any judgements that clearly articulated its secret policy until the 2009 case of FamCA 1251 of 2009 which showed that the Court will award custody to a parent who: psychologically abused a child, made many deliberate false allegations, actively sabotaged contact of the child with the other parent, will not teach the children the culture of the other parent and had even abandoned another child of theirs.
Off the record information from professionals with long history in family law indicates that if child custody litigation goes on for many years the Court has in the past ALWAYS awarded sole and exclusive custody to the toxic psychologically abusive parent. The indications are that over the last decade that some judges have begun to recognise the harm leaving a child with a psychological abuser and the Court will only award them sole custody in around 95 % of cases now.
A Family Court Judge is a decision maker:
-not educated to arrive at the best for your child;
-has no effective method to arrive at the best decision for your child;
-is not accountable for the decision;
-is not trained to give your family the therapy it needs;
-it is in the financial best interests of his/her profession to generate as much litigation as possible;
-could be swayed by professional friendships or bribery to make a decision.
THIS WON'T TAKE LONG AND IT WON'T IMPACT THE KIDS ?
Tragically too many children are murdered by a parent whilst family Court proceedings are on foot or shortly thereafter. The Coroner has already determined Family Court proceedings to be a causal factor from Family Court proceedings.
The Inquest into the deaths of Grace's two sisters and mother found:
'The evidence makes clear that parties to Family Court proceeding can be subjected to intense, ongoing stress. It is also clear that such stress, along with cannabis use, was a contributing, if not precipitating, factor of Ms Glendinning’s psychosis.' (paragraph 225)
The process can take a very long time and severely impacts on children. To quote from Psychologically Abused Child child Grace whose Aligned mother murdered her two sisters and then killed herself:
“The Family Court of WA has been a part of my life as long as I can remember (she was 18 when she wrote this)
My overall experience of the Family Court has been one of immense negativity, distress and trauma.
Those who interviewed me always had an agenda outside of 'checking up' on how my sisters and I were feeling, both emotionally and physically. We just never knew whose agenda we were supposed to be serving in our interviews
• Many repeatedly suggested scenarios that they believed to have happened (but never had) were put to us and pushed on us in the interviews in what felt like an endeavour to give certain answers to their questions. Sometimes in the end we agreed with whatever they were putting to use because we were tired and fed up of being there and just wanted to stop being asked those questions and get out.
Mum would show me the court documents and tell me all about the proceedings and would talk about how the Family Court was trying to take us away from her and go on rants about my father that would either involve her breaking chairs in the house or crying uncontrollably.
Mum never really worked full time as her days were consumed by the court battles.
Mum's family never felt approachable on the subject, and in the early stages of my life I rarely saw Dad's side of the family (which I did not understand then but now know it was because of Orders made by the family court?
When I did eventually see my Dad on a more regular basis I just didn't know how to raise it without getting Mum into trouble (an inaccurate belief but one that my 13 yo self held)
The current practice of sending a psychologist or social worker into the home of children for a few hours is flawed; children lie, withhold the truth, have been coached by a parent and have been led to believe they will not see a parent again if they told the truth, all of these are things that I have done, been told and accepted as truth throughout my childhood.
I did not have all of the facts, I did not have the situation explained to me in a truthful and unbiased way and no child should be asked to choose between their parents. I wish someone had explained to us why we never saw dad, explained that he did love us and wanted to see us but we never got that.
We were only ever told what mum wanted us to think of him and it was never positive and never unbiased.”
Dragging and involving a child in long litigation will adversely impact their ACE's score and have a lifelong impact on their health.
I WANT THE BEST FOR MY CHILDREN SO I WILL FIGHT FOR THEM TO BE WITH ME MOST OF THE TIME BECAUSE I AM THE BEST PARENT ?