PARENT RULES NOT TO BE BROKEN
1 Don't move more than 3 km away from the other parent.
2 Family Court Litigation (ie going to Court) damages children psychologically. Don't do it.
3 Children to spend lots of time with both parents.
4 Children to spend frequent time with both sets of grand parents.
5 Children to spend frequent time with all cousins, uncles and aunts.
6 Say positive things about the other parent.
7 Not say negative things about the other parent.
8 Children not to be confided and told any adult issues.
(ie adult partner information, information about divorce, financial matters between parents, etc)
9 Don't create the impression that the other parent is dangerous.
10 Don't pressure a child to choose between parents.
11 Don't force the child to reject the other parent.
12 Parent/child communication is not to be interfered with or monitored.
13 Don't interfere with photos and other momentos of the other parent in your house.
14 Don't withdraw love when the child shows positive connection to the other parent.
15 Don't tell the child that the other parent does not love them.
16 Allow the parent child roles to be reversed.
17 Children are not to be used as spies.
18 Don't ask the child to keep secrets from the other parent.
19 Refer to the other parent as mum or dad not by their name.
20 Treat step parents as step parents not real parents.
21 Share important information such as medical, educational and other relevant information with the other parent.
22 Ensuring that the other parent's name is on medical, academic, and other relevant documents.
23 Do not change the child's name.
24 Do not cultivate dependency on the part of the child.
25 Children not to be used as messengers.
26 Time with children not a bargaining chip.
27 Do not use the threat of suicide to co-erce your children.
List compiled with the aid of published works by Dr Amy Baker & Paul Fine which are representative of many writings by academic authors of the issue of children of separated parents who reject one parent. The items on the list come mostly from Psyschologists interviewing children that have eventually escaped the psychological control of a parent that coerced them to reject the other parent such as Brendan & JP Byrne.
Litigation (ie going to Court) damages children psychologically. Don't do it.
IF ANY RULES BROKEN:
PARENT & CHILDREN MUST
Let the other parent know
Let both sets of relatives know
Let God Parent's/Religious know
Let school psychologist know
Let school friends know
Call Kids Helpline 1800 551 800
Unless steps are taken to fix things.
REJECTION OF A PARENT BY A CHILD IS CAUSED BY CHILD PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE